When you teach it must be in service to your students.  It is not about you.  It must come from your love for them.  -Master D'Amico

More Pittsburgh

Took an audition this morning, but didn't advance.  With every audition there is something to learn.  I know my music well and can play it well, but something is happening at the point of auditioning that needs examination and reflection.  

Afterwards, a native Pittsburgh cellist suggested a place to walk that had some restaurants and shops.  I also took a detour across the river.  It's a beautiful city.  Ben and Jerry's only had a few flavors, but one of them (vegan peanut butter chocolate cookie) would have been the choice among hundreds.  And then I took a walk to Point State Park to see the start of the Ohio river and look down to Cincinnati.

River walk, north side of the Allegheny River

Meeting the three rivers, looking to Ohio

Weekend So Far

I am now in Pittsburgh, a beautiful city that reminds me a great deal of Cincinnati.  A cab driver took me to the Airbnb where I'm staying by way of a paper map, a magnifying glass to read it, and a touristic approach to all the buildings we passed.  I'm on a big hill overlooking a city, a spot that I can only imagine would cost millions of dollars in Manhattan, but here is covered with tiny winding streets and small modest homes.  These pictures don't quite do justice, but it's an idea.  

 
Yesterday's belt test was a very full day.  It left me feeling both peaceful and reflective. Tomorrow is an audition, another event to round out this incredible weekend.

Arrival in Madison

I'm back in Madison, Wisconsin.  There is something frightenly clear about the quality of the air here.  I don't have a vocabulary to describe it, perhaps it is "blue," or "hopeful."  People might usually use the words "clear," or "clean," but I think it is so much more than that.  Not magical.  I think it could be measured and compared to the air of New York, but I just don't have the verbal means to describe it empirically.  

I'm staying at a friend's house, (who actually lives in New York) but another friend is living here, one who picked my up from the airport, and suggested some of the restaurant choices in the neighborhood, Thai, Laotian, Mediterranean, African, American, all within 3 blocks.  Just step over or along the bike path in the backyard and you're there.  

The sky is so huge.

I am here for a belt test tomorrow.  And then a dinner.  And the following day to Pittsburgh for an audition.  There are so many things going on all once.  So many growth spurts in such a short time, like  that evening I had my braces laced and my smile changed overnight.  Sometimes I worry that I am losing perspective.  But I am very glad to be here, and very much looking forward to being in Pittsburgh, and on a long train ride, and back in New York, again.  There are many celebrations to be having.  The sky is open.  

Sharing on the Bus

A man on the bus today shared with me that his late wife had played the violin.  "Where do you play?" he said with a smile.  "Oh around, here and there."  "My late wife played, had her masters."  He had gotten up for his stop, so the doors opened and with a good-bye acknowledgment, stepped off.

People touch me sometimes.  What made him need to tell me this?  I have some inking, can't really know, but can imagine.  And that touches me, makes me grateful for his sharing.

Bottleneck of Appreciation

This coming weekend is a bottleneck.  Two things that I am very excited about but probably for that reason, want to give my full energy.  It is an opportunity for stress as much as it is an opportunity for joy.  And important to remember that both opportunities are there.  How often is it possible to turn stress into joy?  We are often stressed about things that we care for.  Maybe it is a matter of discovering the source of our care to do something well, and to see stressful anticipation or experiences as chances to actively try in the service of those things more fully.

But as much as it is important to see that it might be possible to find joy in the things that can cause stress, so too is it important to really acknowledge stress and its power.  Sometimes we can mitigate it by turning it on its side, but sometimes we need to step away from it, to identify the way that it is manifesting in unhealthy ways.  It is a powerful and helpful tool, but not if it rules us.  Learning to take the reigns, perhaps it is a lesson to learn a million times throughout life.

It is a such a privilege and pleasure to be preparing for an audition.  And I am so grateful to have the Tae Kwon Do community and thread which runs alongside the rest of my life, strengthening it and reminding me that there is something more than the day to day that can seem to unrelentingly force our service upon it.

This is a bottleneck of appreciation.  And after that, a bike and spring.

Parks in Manhattan

I enjoyed two parks today, one with a salad and my cello in Hells Kitchen, and one with Andrew, walking in the green in Riverside.  There was a patch of trees with incredible blossoms and a wonderful smell, and people were out with their dogs, taking pictures of them posed under the white and purple branches.  It is really wonderful to have someone with whom to go for a spring walk in the park.